When it comes to the sprawling, fractured timeline of the Halloween franchise, fan opinion is notoriously divided. Everyone has their favorite and most maligned installment. In the latter instance, purists have debated for a long time whether the cult-driven lore of The Curse of Michael Myers went off the rails, or if Rob Zombie’s brutal, gritty reimaginings strayed too far from Haddonfield’s city limits.
Yet, among all thirteen entries, there is one universal focal point of absolute disdain. It’s a film so ill-conceived, so bafflingly misguided, that even the master of horror-cum-series creator John Carpenter couldn’t hold back his fury.
Haddonfield’s Undisputed Rock Bottom
That honor belongs to Halloween: Resurrection from 2002. Released smack dab in the middle of the found-footage craze conjured by The Blair Witch, Resurrection didn’t just stumble; it practically nose-dived into early-2000s slasher clichés, which is unfortunate for the flick as much as for the idea.
Fresh off the retcon success of Halloween H20, which tried to forget everything about the Thorn Trilogy (including its bright spot in the darkness, Jamie Lloyd), the eighth installment immediately infuriated fans by killing Laurie Strode off in the opening ten minutes, cheapening her triumphant climax.
From there, the movie pivoted to an absurdly dated, though prescient, premise involving a reality series, live-streamed on the web, and set inside the abandoned Myers house. Complete with webcams and GoPro-style perspectives, rapper and star Busta Rhymes steals the show (for good or ill) with his ‘mad’ karate skills, and a line that continues to haunt horror fans for all the wrong reasons.
The film has frequently been on the receiving end of virulent venom, with Carpenter himself famously providing his unfiltered reaction when asked about the sequel years later. He recalled, “I watched the one in that house, with all the cameras. Oh my god. Oh lord, god. And then the guy gives the speech at the end about violence. What the hell? Oh my lord. I couldn’t believe…”
High Fashion, Low Expectations
When Michael’s progenitor puts a hand over his face, you know the movie is in trouble. But it turns out, horror fans and Carpenter aren’t the only ones eager to bury Halloween: Resurrection deep in the basement. Even its noteworthy cast wants nothing to do with it – starting with supermodel-turned-actress Tyra Banks…
Banks, when asked if she had any fondness for her moment in horror’s blood-red limelight, was blunt. “No. Not even a little bit. Like, not even a tiny bit,” she said. She added that she wasn’t interested until her agent made hard-to-refuse promises, including a memorable death scene and the career potential of Josh Hartnett.
Obviously, neither came to pass. While Hartnett leveraged his breakout performances in Halloween H20 and The Faculty into major studio tentpoles like Pearl Harbor and Black Hawk Down, Banks retreated to runways, magazine covers, daytime TV, and America’s Next Top Model. There is nothing wrong with that, but it still isn’t movie stardom, and broken promises are broken promises.
Half a Century of Broken Promises
Still, no one has borne the brunt of more broken promises and lost opportunities than fans of the franchise. Halloween fans have survived plenty of bad decisions, but Resurrection easily takes the crown as the franchise’s absolute rock bottom.
Almost half a century of Michael Myers stalking Haddonfield hasn’t produced a lower ebb than this. It’s so bad that it makes a critical reevaluation of The Curse of Michael Myers, Rob Zombie’s remake timeline, and Halloween Ends seem reasonable.
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